The story goes like this, and I am quoting her here:
” I am always hiding things from my husband because I am afraid of what he will say or do. Is this abuse of some sorts? We have been married for 24 years and that is all I have been seeing and it is to the point of me having to hide even being on MyLot or planning to do something without him up in my face. I have a job that pays well but was placed on medical from my doctor three months ago because I was brought home by my boss for having fainted in the break room.
Ever since then he is like you have to go back to work – I have no money – when are you going back to work – that costs money – this costed how much – you cannot do that or you cannot do this. He even called my doctor because he did not believe me when I told him the doctor would not send me back to work – he told the doctor that he thinks I am faking this problem.
I was told that I have diabetes and that my readings were that of a coma person. He has never once asked how I felt or feel. I had to get insulin the other day and he said he wasn’t giving me the money and that I had better go back to work if I plan on buying it. I went and applied for help and when I got home he flared up about how it is an embossment for me to have to go seeking help. I just do not know what to do. I feel as though the only reason I am in this mans life is to support him with a job that makes 2 times his pay. What would you do here? Hugs”
To tell you the truth, I couldn’t believe that a guy who is in love, and being married for 24 years with this lady, could display such selfishness, and no care at all for her medical condition. If something is ABUSE, than this is a great example of Domestic Mental Abuse in my books.
I replied to her with the following:
“…I feel so sorry for you when I read what you are saying. This does sound like abuse to me, and I’d like to tell your story on my blog, and of course without naming you explicitly with name and personal info.
In your case, I would definitely not go to work if you are feeling ill, no matter what. Your doctor told you to stay at home because of your condition, and no matter what your husband is saying, you should not go. Is he only abusive with words or also physically? Because he is also abusing you physically you should go away from there, if possible of course.
How can he deny you your medicine is beyond understanding for me, and the fact that he has told your doctor that you are faking it. This guy does not deserve you my dear, that’s for sure. Please check this discussion about the Abuse issue and let me know if you would like me to cover your story for tomorrow on my blog”
In her answer she gave me permission to use her story, as you can see here:
“He says things to me that makes me feel as though the only reason he married me was for a tax write off – money tree – someone to go to work and come home and cleanup after. He keeps telling me that the medications are too expensive but when I tried to get help paying for them he said that it is a lazy mans way of treating the system.
He has never physically touched me or threw anything at me because I think he knows I would leave without a doubt but I did tell him that if he was so worried about what everyone else in his so called high classed life would say tell them that he needs better pay or he needs a loan. I just do not get the fact that all he wants me to do is getting back to work so I can start the same thing, all over again to where I am the bread winner paying all the bills while he racks up more and having nothing to show for it. It is my fault there is no cable ( big deal) it is my fault there is no food in the house ( that is why I tried to get assistance) he has no medications ( no insurance while off work ) no money to golf – bowl – eat out every day with his family – buy lotto – and most of all no money to play all those pools they have every day at his work such as nascar – football – lottery – horse racing – ect.
Well we don’t have cable – no more eating out – no more work pools – no more lotto – no extra money for sports and that is why he is pressuring me back to work. But if he needs to call the doctor every time I go instead of taking a day off from work so be it. I just think it would be easier if he just came out and told everyone that he is trying to hold down the fort for a while I get better and get back to work. Swallow his pride for once, if you will. Yes you can post this on the blog for I would like to know if there is any one else with this problem. Thank you may have helped others as well. Hugs”
What could we do against Abuse? Be it in our lives, or in the lives of people that we know? Or, wherever? Apart from displaying the various stories on our blogs, what could we really do to stop any type of Abuse? Our world will be such a lovely place if there was no abuse, and no greed, or selfishness, and evilness.
Most probably abuse could be eliminated from our lives from the moment we get born. By our parents, and the way we are brought up, and the values and norms taught to us by them? However what if it is not only the parents holding the Sacred Key to a more loving human race? Where should we look for answers than?